1.Bang Bang! Thud Thud!
Taylor Big
The Blues：Man's Best Friend
Bang Bang! Thud Thud!
Bang Bang! Thud Thud!
I got shot down in cold blood,
Without warning, shot by a woman I loved.
Her kisses, were sweet lies,
That's how she took me by surprise,
She led me on while planning my demise.
Bang Bang! I went down,
And I felt like a country clown,
Let a pretty little teaser put me on the ground.
Another notch, on her gun,
I guess that's how she has her fun,
She aims to hurt you before she turns and runs.
Too good, to be true!
Man, she might be alaying for you,
The same little teaser that shot me through and through.
Bang Bang! Thud Thud!
I got shot down in cold blood,
Without mercy, shot by a woman I loved.
2.Creak'n Bedsprings
Taylor Big
The Blues：Man's Best Friend
Creak'n Bedsprings
The loneliest sound, that ever I heard,
Warn't no freight train, warn't no night-singing bird;
But the sound of bed-springs, creakin' with love and life;
Just a hurtful reminder how love has passed me by.
Young folks next door, you know the walls are thin;
When they ain't fighting what they doing again;
Its the sound of bed-springs, creakin' with love and life;
Just a hurtful reminder how love has passed me by.
In every movie, every love scene I see,
On every channel of every TV,
Its the sound of bed-springs, creakin' with love and life;
Just a hurtful reminder how love has passed me by.
Through my open window, when the night is clear,
The outside world makes that sound that I hear;
Its the sound of bed-springs, creakin' with love and life;
Just a hurtful reminder how love has passed me by.
3.Drunken Woman Blues
Taylor Big
The Blues：Man's Best Friend
Drunken Woman Blues
You can drink your liquor, you can drink your cold canned beer,
You can drink your liquor, you can drink your cold canned beer,
But a drunken woman sure ain't welcome here.
A drunken woman loves to fuss and fight,
A drunken woman loves to fuss and fight,
She's got a temper like a snappin' turtle got bite.
A drunken woman ain't no friend of yours,
A drunken woman ain't no friend of yours,
While you feelin' most friendly, she passes out and snores.
She won't keep house or mind what the children do,
She won't keep house or mind what the children do,
If it ain't burned down, then a dirty home greets you.
She won't cook nothin' lays sick in bed all day,
She won't cook nothin' lays sick in bed all day,
Then she snatches your wallet and drinks the night away.
She won't work wants you to foot her bills,
She won't work wants you to foot her bills,
And if you don't, she finds another man that will
A drunken woman's too easy with her love,
A drunken woman's too easy with her love,
So three men, four men, five men's ain't enough.
You can drink your liquor, you can drink your cold canned beer,
You can drink your liquor, you can drink your cold canned beer,
But a drunken woman sure ain't welcome here.
4.Hound Dog Blues
Taylor Big
The Blues：Man's Best Friend
Hound Dog Blues
I got myself a hound dog,
To be my only friend;
She's faithful and she's loyal,
She won't run for other men.
She don't want much of nothing,
No money, jewels or furs;
Dry dog food and her master's touch,
Is good enough for her.
When I am broke and lonesome
She senses how I feel;
She comes to me and wags her tail
To say she loves me still.
She don't bitch and argue
She always aims to please;
She's too smart and grateful
To bite the hand that feeds.
I got myself a hound dog,
To be my only friend;
She's faithful and she's loyal,
She won't run for other men.
5.King Snake
Taylor Big
The Blues：Man's Best Friend
King Snake
I'm a king snake, huntin' little birds like you;
I'm a king snake, huntin' little birds like you;
I'll slip in your nest baby, squeeze you all night through.
I crawl on my belly, and I scale the highest tree,
I crawl on my belly, and I scale the highest tree;
All that hard work, whole lot of fun for me.
I'm deaf and I'm dumb, don't know a word you say,
I'm deaf and I'm dumb, don't know a word you say;
So all that idle chatter won't help you get away.
And when I've caught you, holding you close and still,
And when I've caught you, holding you close and still;
I won't take just a mouthful, gonna take my fill.
Some people ask me how I catchem 'fore they flies,
Some people ask me how I catchem 'fore they flies;
I play blues music to'em, keeps 'em hypnotized.
6.Le Machine
Taylor Big
The Blues：Man's Best Friend
Le Machine
I got a little gal with an appetite,
She's got me half-scared to go home at night;
I never seen a woman so hard to please.
She got me worn out got me weak in my knees,
I can't take my rest, she won't let me sleep,
And she's made me promise things I can't keep;
So I went downtown to the novelty shop;
Told the storekeeper want the best he's got;
He said he keeps the finest line of marital aids,
But they ain't cheap toys, have I means to pay.
I said I got a Visa and a Mastercard,
At least a thousand dollar trade-in if he'll take my car.
He took me to the back room and opened the safe,
And off the shelf pulled a red velvet case.
Said 'This is only offered to select clientele,
Where you got it you must never tell;
It's a military secret here and abroad,
And everywhere else it's against the law'.
'It's got a microprocessor and eight meg of ram,
A thousand selectable user programs,
And the operating system has biofeeds,
It always knows what your baby needs.
The thrills and excitement that she fantasize
Through virtual reality are realized'.
'It can run automatic, or manual control,
Variate its temperature from hot to cold,
It caresses and manipulates, it tickles and stings
Her erogenous zones - it makes her little bells ring;
And medically proven, and clinically safe,
Its got safety overload features just in case'.
'Its got a eight hundred number, user hotline,
Ain't no elevator music there to waste your time;
The replacement guarantee is the very best,
You get a new one shipped air freight express;
It simply is the finest model we've ever seen
The French women call it 'Le Machine''.
I got peace of mind, got contentment and bliss,
I never knew that love could be as easy as this.
I can stay up late now and watch TV,
Or turn in early as the mood suits me;
And my baby loves me for what I've done,
She says I'm 'the only man allowed to power on!'
7.Mississippi River Blues
Taylor Big
The Blues：Man's Best Friend
Mississippi River Blues
Broonzy, Big Bill
Mississippi River,
Is so long, deep and wide,
I can see my good gal on that other side.
You know I cried, and I called,
But I could not make her hear,
I'm gonna catch that boat baby, steam on over there.
Big boat is up the river,
Lord, stuck on a bank of sand,
I'll never see my baby, I'll never make that land.
Ain't it hard, to love someone,
When they are so far from you;
I am so lonesome, I don't know what to do.
8.Mister, Mister
Taylor Big
The Blues：Man's Best Friend
Mister, Mister
Mister, mister, give me a ride,
Been standin' for hours by this highway sign,
I gotta leave this mean little town,
Living here, lord, has got me down.
It was nobody's business what I done,
I didn't steal nothin', didn't hurt no one.
Mister, mister, give me a ride,
I'm good conversation and I'll help you drive,
Gotta story to tell you, when we're down the road,
How your so-called friends can really lay you low.
All I done was to love who I please,
But those small-minded people all turned on me.
Mister, mister, give me a ride,
I won't slow you down to say goodbye.
Ain't got much luggage to crowd your car,
One duffel bag, and this old guitar.
Everything I worked for, I'm leaving right here,
I got pawn tickets for my souvenirs.
Mister, mister, give me a ride,
Sun's going down leavin' me behind,
I done it for love, I never meant to be mean
But the consequences was unforseen;
I'm leavin' this town where I don't belong,
Headin' somewhere else where lovin' ain't wrong.
Mister, mister, give me a ride,
Please don't be another pass-me-by,
I'm stranded here where I don't want to be,
And a ride out of town would rescue me,
Where you're going I really don't care,
Just give me a ride please, and get me there.
9.Slick Willy Blues
Taylor Big
The Blues：Man's Best Friend
Slick Willy Blues
They call me Slick Willy, I'm the boss of this land,
They call me Slick Willy, I'm the boss of this land,
You got to stand in line for hours just to shake my hand.
When you see me on TV, hear me on the radio,
When you see me on TV, hear me on the radio,
I got two answers for every question, ain't nothin' I don't
know.
Some men are mad at me, cause I didn't fight in no war,
Some men are mad at me, cause I didn't fight in no war,
I was too smart for that bullshit, that's what suckers are for.
I got to have your money, gonna spread it around,
I got to have your money, gonna spread it around,
Buying friends with your cash, best gig I found.
I got in trouble, way down in Arkansas,
I got in trouble, way down in Arkansas,
Changed my name and address, just to dodge the law.
They call me Slick Willy, I'm at the top of the heap,
They call me Slick Willy, I'm at the top of the heap,
I never made a promise, that I was bound to keep.
10.Whiskey Headed Man
Taylor Big
The Blues：Man's Best Friend
Whiskey Headed Man
McClennon, Tommy
He's a whiskey headed man, and he stays drunk all the time;
He's a whiskey headed man, and he stays drunk all the time;
Sure as he don't stop drinkin', I believe he's gonna lose his
mind.
Every time I see that man, he's at the whiskey joint,
Tryin' to borrow some money, baby, to get one more half a pint.
He's a whiskey headed man, and he stays drunk all the time;
He's a whiskey headed man, and he stays drunk all the time;
Sure as he don't stop drinkin', I believe he's gonna lose his
mind.
He can't buy his groceries, and he can't pay his rent,
Sits around aworryin' where all his money went.
He's a whiskey headed man, and he stays drunk all the time;
He's a whiskey headed man, and he stays drunk all the time;
Sure as he don't stop drinkin', I believe he's gonna lose his
mind.
Drunk every night, drunk every day,
Whiskey got his soul, gonna lead him away.
He's a whiskey headed man, and he stays drunk all the time;
He's a whiskey headed man, and he stays drunk all the time;
Sure as he don't stop drinkin', I believe he's gonna lose his
mind.
He's a whiskey headed man, and he stays drunk all the time;
He's a whiskey headed man, and he stays drunk all the time;
Sure as he don't stop drinkin', I believe he's gonna lose his
mind.
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